Justin Bieber ate dinner last night with a girl not named Selena Gomez. EVERYBODY PANIC.

The tabloids are going batshit today because Justin Bieber ate dinner with a “mystery girl” at Mr. Chow in London last night.




They’ll have you believe is some kind of sadist devil-worshiping hooker with a vendetta against Selena Gomez. Oh, and he also flipped off the paparazzi, that again, they’ll have you believe is some kind of gateway gesture to hardcore drug use.

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