1. David Hasselhoff
David Hasselhoff got his start in the 1970s on the popular daytime drama, “The Young and the Restless,” playing Dr. Snapper Foster. Even though his acting chops didn’t set the world on fire at the time, Hasselhoff went on to play Michael Knight on the 1980s program “Knight Rider,” and Mitch Buchannon in “Baywatch.” In addition to “wowing” the viewing public, Hasselhoff also became a singing sensation… mostly in Europe, which is strange as I always thought Europeans had more taste than that. Two of his songs went to number one in Germany. Hasselhoff’s lack of talent was recently solidified as he was the subject of a Comedy Central Roast… that’s when you know you’ve really hit rock bottom, when celebrities who are worse no-names than you are making jokes to an international television audience about your lack of talent!
2. Paris Hilton
She’s famous for being rich….. what bigger waste of space could there possibly be than Paris Hilton? When you look up the word “overrated” in the dictionary, Hilton’s photo practically leaps off the page as a prime example. Give the girl some credit, she has attempted to have a few “real” careers, like modeling (at which she wasn’t half bad), singing (to the dismay of dogs everywhere who started howling as soon as the first notes of “Stars are Blind” were played – what an appropriate title for a Paris Hilton song, by the way), and acting (at which she was truly horrible).
3. Taylor Hicks
“And the new American Idol is…. Taylor Hicks!” These eight words put fear in the hearts of music lovers everywhere in 2006, when Hicks won the fifth season of the reality television show. Granted, the talent wasn’t very competitive that year, with Kat McPhee as a runner-up, but many feel that Chris Daughtry, who came in fourth place that year, should have been the clear winner. Hicks certainly hasn’t wowed the public since 2006, only releasing two albums – thankfully!
4. Rosie O’Donnell
I’ll have to admit, there was a time, long ago, when Rosie O’Donnell was actually relevant… and funny. She was a stand-up comedian in the late 1970s-early 1980s, and appeared on the reality show “Star Search,” which was sort of the 1980s answer to “America’s Got Talent.” Since then, however, O’Donnell’s career, and talent, has gone downhill. She hosted a popular daytime television program in the 1990s. Then she began to slowly, gradually morph from the “Queen of Nice” into the “Queen of Mean.” Now, O’Donnell is seen as a militant, anti-gun lesbian who rarely has a smile on her face.
5. Rush Limbaugh
Conservative radio host, prescription drug addict, author… this no-talent windbag has done it all. Rush Limbaugh has embarrassed himself (apparently not enough) and his listeners through some of his thoughtless antics, such as the time he made fun of Michael J. Fox for his twitchy Parkinson’s movements, saying he was exaggerating his disease (which was not true); the parody of “Puff the Magic Dragon” he came up with entitled “Barack the Magic Negro;” and his calling soldiers who criticize the war “phony soldiers.” Someone needs to stop this waste of space from ever opening his mouth publicly again.